Time to catch my breath

I have not posted in almost a week. The past week has been so hectic and emotional. I found out last week that my best friends brother was in the hospital again. He is in need of a new heart and is at the top of the donor list. He had an LVAD put in a couple months ago and that quit working. Since last Thursday he has had 4, yes I said FOUR open heart surgeries. They are like my second family and I love them dearly! I can't believe something like this is happening to such good hearted people, but God has a plan for everyone. So I pray daily and leave it in His hands.

On top of that my hubby and I have not been in a good place, I mean do single women these days not know how to leave a married man alone?? Really whorebag he is mine and he is not going to leave me for you, so get the eff over it!!  We finally made a renewed commitment to be better communicating with each other so it should only get better from here!!

I took my measurements, weight, and before pics on Sunday (Sept.30th) night. I was horified. Do people really see me this way? I couldn't believe how far I have let myself go and I felt ashamed! It gave me even more determination to go for this and do soething for myself for a change!! I am alwys putting everyone else in front of myself and it's time to be a little selfish! I started the JM challenge yesterday and man I felt the burn!! Today is day 2 and even though I am so sore I am ready to do it!

 I am reaady to make October the best month of this year so far! Just blogging all this makes me feel better. I got this!!!!